Friend-love

There it is again — this feeling of wanting to jump inside her chest, to be infleshed, full inside, nestled and beating. It is the only way to describe this love. It’s not sexual — it lacks that same sort of longing — but it’s friend-like in a way that I don’t know. It’s love, but friend love — fierce, full friend-love, big love, open-sky love, and if there’s a little bit of greed in there, then it’s a thirsty love. It’s a recognition love, comfy divan chaise sunlight-in-the-face closed-eye love, water lapping love, it’s twisted insides love, gratitude love, we’re-on-this-earth knowing love, and my hands are useless on this love, waving this way and that looking for something that could be held, some motion that makes any sense of this, in a world where touching is not enough, where movement, while impelled, has no root, has no cause, has no direction, no resting place, where movement becomes its own object of love, mute, graceful, arms waving and holding what it can, letting go, holding again under the clear certainty that this, this holding and letting go won’t end, and knowing, too, that it will, and how the continuation and the ending are both true.
Advertisements

About David

Prone to musing and to being prone. Father to two, writer, engineer.
This entry was posted in connection and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Friend-love

  1. This takes my breath away

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s